[personal profile] x_copycat
2:37 am
I have a Honeymoon suite. And a Husband. Sorta. Always thought eloping would involve lots and lots of sex. No sex for me

6:18 am: Wade is scared of girls. And I don't snore.

6:23 am: His tentacle is gimpy

6:41 am: Sexless marriage is no way for a marriage to begin. He eats like 80 sandwiches an hour. By tomorrow I will have a husband who let himself go

7:26 am: He offered to take the pictures.

7:35 am: Husband is trying to be slick abt staring at my ass. Husband is so not slick

8:03 am: We weren't late, he's just not graceful on snow

8:11am: He's right. I have a fabulous backside.

9:15 am: I think Instructor Dan wants to kick Wade in the shin with his metal foot spikes.

9:41 am: He gave me a curvy sharp metal thing. Ice Axe. They gave me an axe.

9:58 am: Husband is backing away slowly. Can't imagine why

11:14 am: dun dun dun another one bites the dust.

11:27 am Husband is gimping. Might have to carry him home

12:08 pm: Ow. Ow.

12:13 pm: Snow is not fluffy and soft and happy. Snow Kills

12:17 pm: Ow That will so bruise

12:25 pm: Keep it up, sport and you'll carry me home

12:39 pm: Also, still have foot spikes

1:17 pm: Note to Husband: Ice is Slippery, duh!

1:50 pm: huzzah! progress without killing myself!

3:01 pm: Am causing husband great distress in jacuzzi. He's terrified I will drown
And of my ladyparts

3:07 pm: Husband also paranoid because his phone died and he doesn't know what I am saying

3:34 pm: He refutes claim that he is scared of lady parts. Claims great affection for my lady parts

4:11 pm: I refuse to put on pants, but I will promise to keep my shirt on from now on

4:13 pm: His gimpy tentacle can't take all the blue exposure

4:19 pm: Terrified I tell you

5:08 pm: He's threatening to hide my phone if I don't stop.

5:13 pm: Mmm...husband rules. There is dinner.
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Vanessa Carlysle

December 2015

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